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damnitstrue Damn Its TRUE!

People who work later at night tend to gain more weight.

36 minutes ago Reply Retweet Favorite 132

borowitzreport Andy Borowitz

Just discovered fun new activity: like tweeting, only more words & someone else wrote them. Called “reading.”

41 minutes ago Reply Retweet Favorite 101

sugarscape Sugarscape

The Voice has got more padding than the bra we had on last night...

26 minutes ago Reply Retweet Favorite 25

darrenrovell darren rovell

The 1st Indy 500 champ Ray Harroun got $14,250 in 1911. Factoring in inflation, today's winner will get 675% more.

38 minutes ago Reply Retweet Favorite 25

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chloe_christine Chloe Christine

GET MORE NEW FOLLOWERS? Please Visit - http://t.co/ApKHSuTc

49 minutes ago Reply Retweet Favorite 199K more

heatworld heat & heatworld

But max! We need to see more of him please! #TheVoice

35 minutes ago Reply Retweet Favorite 17

cancerareus CancersAreUs

the more comfortable a #cancer gets with you the more expressive they become

7 minutes ago Reply Retweet Favorite 34

haudricourt Tom

#Brewers checked in on Roy Oswalt but apparently he wanted more money than they have in budget for half a season. So, they are out on him.

30 minutes ago Reply Retweet Favorite 29

beauty_omg Bahja Rodriguez :)

If I say turn up ONE MORE TIME today,imma go crazy!! Lol I'm making myself mad!!😒😒😒

7 minutes ago Reply Retweet Favorite 15

itsmarcusburton Marcus Burton

What you think of yourself is much more important than what people think of you.

22 minutes ago Reply Retweet Favorite 39

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